Live. Love. Laugh. Listen. Learn.
I ended my first blog with this. So, it's apt I start this second and emotional blog the same way. All these words have been a part of my journey to today…..
I am Sophia…a lady who loves elegance, style, sensuality, empowerment for women, helping people, travel, new experiences and doing the right thing.
But I am also David. I was born biologically as a man and still am biologically a man.
Sophia is the personification of me embracing my feminine side and feelings and in doing so, loving dressing, talking, feeling and being the woman that Sophia is. And the time has come for me to tell you this.
So much has happened in life over the last few years for me, both wonderful things and the harder sadder things as well. That I know will be the case for so many of you. That is the nature of human life. Sophia is a part of that now as I continue to evolve and develop personally. The 'Learn' in my mantra words above.
There is much more to tell about my journey as Sophia, the when, why, what, how and where to from here. All in good time. For now I wanted to let you know a few snippets of how I feel today letting you into my inner, previously private, life of David and Sophia.
I have a calmness about me – telling me that this is the right time for me to come out so to speak. It is authentic for me now to do so. A sense of freedom, honesty to myself and so celebrating all that I am in a way also. A degree of excitement of where this path is taking me but knowing I want to be on the path and keep walking forward. And of course, some fear and concerns. Society has become more open in recent years in so many areas. But that is always a work in progress and there is so much more to do in striving for true equality for everyone. I am not ready to reveal Sophia to all in every single aspect of my life. Step by step as I go.
My fabulous psychologist who has helped me for 7 years now on so many aspects of my life raved about the book The Surrender Experiment, by Michael A Singer. In a nutshell, it is Michael’s true story of his belief in the universe presenting opportunities to you that do not seem to fit in with the conventional view of your life journey. When those opportunities present themselves, “surrender” to them. Go with them and have faith that you were meant to follow them and that is how you enjoy a fulfilling life and your true purpose.
I mention this as I have been trying this in recent years. I am now willing to look at what might at first appear hurdles, challenges or left field ideas and opportunities as events that were meant for me to learn from and experience. This can be at a macro level in my life and the micro everyday stuff. Take what has happened to me over this last weekend before writing this blog on my coming out as Sophia who is also David.
Last Saturday was Mardi Gras in Sydney. I booked tickets to a Honey Birdette hosted party at Noir a few months ago. I was so excited planning my outfit for the night and which heels & stockings to wear and looking forward to celebrating Mardi Gras and being free with lots of others at the party. But I was not able to get there as the crowds were too big so the Police had no choice but to stop more people getting onto Oxford Street in Sydney where the party was and of course is where the Mardi Gras parade happens. So that party was not meant to be for me.
I had earlier rang a friend of mine to see if she was in Sydney as I had a couple of spare tickets for the Mardi Gras party. She called me back just as I was giving up waiting at the police barrier to see if I could get into Oxford Street to the party. She and some friends were in a bar for Mardi Gras and asked me to join them. I had to walk a far away to get around the crowd barriers to the bar. So heels off, in hand and off I went walking quickly. I arrived at the door and the guy at the door said, “you will have to wear your shoes to go in and keep them on.” I replied, “I have been dying to get my heels on and into a bar all night.”
I met my friend and some of her friends. I had a ball just chatting and talking and meeting new people. I smiled, laughed and relaxed. All bar my friend had never met Sophia before or knew anything about me. But the support and no judgement from them all was wonderful and heart-warming for me. I could not thank them enough (I tried…) for having made my whole evening.
And so I surrendered to not getting to the Honey Birdette party and my genuine disappointment of that having booked and planned it in advance. Which led me to a different but loving, wonderful time and excitement for Sophia meeting new people. And today I surrender to Sophia’s journey and my wish to acknowledge who she is, I am and will forever be.